The Decision

I'm in my twenties and I think I may have already entered a midlife crisis. Some of my gray hair is starting to show (been there since 19). I'm starting to go to sleep early a lot, and I'm starting to lose interest in a lot of things that I loved a year or 2 ago. Heck, I'm starting to change my stance a lot when it comes to certain things. And in the midst of all of this, I have decided to make another life altering decision. I've decided to go back to school.

As you already know, I have 2 degrees. What I never told you was that it was an Associate's and a Bachelor's degree. When most people say they have 2 degrees, you would think they're talking about a Bachelor's and a Master's. If I had continued immediately after completing my Bachelor's, sure I'll be saying I have 3 right now which is one heck of an accomplishment. Well, the cat's out of the bag now. So yeah, I have decided to pursue my MFA (Master of Fine Arts). Unless I'm taking the wrong approach when it comes to trying to get a job in the industry I love, it looks like the Bachelor's degree has taken the same route as an Associate's, which is basically no longer relevant. Sure, both degrees are still relevant in some other industries but at least from my perspective, they don't mean swat here anymore. I could be wrong, but I've been searching and searching and searching, but yet I'm still not "qualified". It's discouraging.

Going back to school is a huge decision because it requires a lot of time and readjustments. This is something I've been sitting on as far back as September of last year. If only I had made the decision several months earlier, I wouldn't be typing this entry right now. But at the time I was working at the TV station and of course I didn't like it because the position I was in didn't offer any room for advancement, but I was still naive. I continued to hold out hope that maybe something good would come out of it. I figured once these more known stations see this on my resume that maybe it would give me a boost and they would at least be more open to interviews. Unfortunately I wasn't even granted that. I understand that there are a million others out there just like me, but there are also millions of others out there who are less deserving but are doing much better. I was always brought up on the notion that hard work pays off, not association. But apparently it doesn't apply anymore.

Since September, I had a hard time trying to decide on where I was going to go. The most logical choice is to go somewhere doesn't require me to relocate. My choices were the following:

1. Wayne State University
2. College for Creative Studies
3. Specs Howard (for continuing education diploma)
4. Macomb Community College (for continuing education diploma)
5. Madonna University
6. Detroit Film Center (film certification)
7. Motion Picture Institute of Michigan (film certification)

As of September, I've narrowed it down to these schools mainly for convenience because I didn't have the money to relocate. However, I will not be attending these schools for the following reasons (each number below matches the number above):

1. I've already obtained my B.A. here. One of my requirements for attending grad school was to find at least 2 of my former professors so that they each can write a letter of recommendation. As you know, professors handle thousands of students a year and 9 out of 10 times when you try to get in touch with them, they're extremely busy and will continue to put you on hold. It also doesn't help with the fact that these professors are hard to get a hold of. There's one (from MCC) I keep in touch with on Facebook but he never answers and is only online once every blue moon.
2. I would love to go here, but they don't have a Master's program for my particular curriculum. They have a Bachelor's program but if I did that, then what was the point of getting my previous B.A.? Besides, they wouldn't accept me if I already have that same degree.
3. As you know, I've graduated from this school before. It wasn't until a few years ago when they've made huge changes and became an actual film program. New technology, new campus/facility, etc. Unfortunately, they no longer have a FAFSA school code therefore I can't apply for financial aid.
4. Just like #3, I've graduated from here. However, most of the continuation courses are spread out here and there and I'm trying to get this over with in one swoop. It would probably take me at least 3 or 4 years just to finish that.
5. Just like #2, they don't have a Master's program for my curriculum. Other than that, this would have been an automatic green light.
6. It showed up in the list of local film schools, but it no longer exist. Haven't even been around for 10 years.
7. I would have loved to attend this school as well, even if I don't get a MFA out of it. Unfortunately like Specs Howard, it doesn't have a school code. It also offer financing options through a program with Michigan Works of which I'm a client. Unfortunately, Michigan Works stopped that program over 2 years ago of which I wasn't informed.

So the 7 schools I've listed above are out of the question. After that, I just continued mercilessly searching for a job. Then February came and I received some news that gave me a small bit of hope. I received a phone call from a recruiter for ESPN (the biggest sports corporation, owned by Disney) about a Production Assistant position I've applied for in January. They were interested in me and it was for a position on their main campus in Bristol, Connecticut. Production Assistant is very entry level, but it's a step in the right direction. I had my interview and it went great. I wouldn't say perfect, but it was close. The woman was very impressed and we even took it as far as to discuss salary. Afterward, she said she was going to try to set me up with an interview with a hiring manager as soon as the following week. I was very excited. However, the following the week, I didn't hear from a hiring manager, but I've heard from another. I've briefly touched on it already so I won't revisit it again, but as of that week, I was no longer employed at the TV station. Also, because I didn't hear from that hiring manager, I went ahead and took a road trip to Chicago with my friends for a few days. I still didn't hear from a hiring manager. I'd say within 2-3 days after I came back, the recruiter emailed me to tell me that they decided to go with a more "inside" resource. My heart was crushed. After that, I'd say took me a few days to recoup and get back on my grind to search for employment, but it became the same ol' song.

Mid-March came and I went back to trying to get into school. Since the 7 I've already listed didn't work out, I've decided that maybe relocation is the only way although I don't have the money. I received tip about a program at Michigan State University. I've started my college career at MSU although I didn't major in this particular program, but a return to East Lansing didn't sound bad at all. Matter of fact, I would love to go back. Unfortunately, I was a month late as far as admissions into their grad program. I wasn't even able to apply online because of the deadline. Then I thought of maybe going a little further west, Grand Valley State University and Western Michigan University. Just like Madonna, they don't offer MFA programs in that particular major. Then I figured maybe Oakland and Eastern. Oakland offers but again I would playing a cat and mouse game with these former professors. Eastern, like the others, didn't offer MFA in that particular major. Then as recently as 2 weeks ago, I've ran into one school that not only offers an MFA degree, but it's also still available for enrollment...

Drums please...

Yes! Central Michigan University in Mt. Pleasant, Michigan. It's a great school, but I'm surprised it never entered my radar before. I have a cousin who graduated from there and I know a former classmate who currently attends. Other than that, I just know that academically it's a pretty good school. I've also heard about how nice and safe the campus is. So as of right now, I have decided to go to Central. Now that of course depends on whether I'll be accepted or not, which is currently pending. I just finished my application yesterday of which I had to answer some questions as well as type out an entrance essay explaining my interest in the school as well as my goals. The program I've entered is the school of Broadcast and Cinema Arts, which is perfect for me. I hope I get in and I hope that this is my last stop.

I want this...NO, I need this.

Wish me luck.